Do you find yourself asking for THIS and THAT with the Law of Attraction… and not getting the results that you want?

The secret to manifesting your desires may be as simple as asking better questions.

Have you ever asked yourself:  WHY do you want IT  _____ (the desire)?

Do you believe that getting it means that you’ll finally have _________ (the real result you desire)? Is having _________ (real result you desire) the driving force behind you reaching your goals, or is there a much deeper reason (a deeper meaning behind it for you)?

For example let’s use a profession like coaching (you can substitute any career or goal that you like here).  Just imagine that you are out there right now wondering whether or not you should become a coach.  Next you might wonder WHY do you want to be a coach? Do you believe that being a coach intrinsically means you’ll make more money, have more flexibility, be in charge of your own destiny, be happier or have more satisfaction? Is having a huge bank account the driving force behind coaching or is it passion for helping others and confronting new challenges everyday that fulfills you?

You may want the coaching business, to get money, prestige, fame or variety… Then again, you may want to coach for the simple pleasure of helping others. Or you may even want to coach to fulfill your own desire to be needed, listened to, respected or admired.  More likely, you may want all of your desires fulfilled so that you can FINALLY BE HAPPY.

Therefore, it begs the question, does being a coach (or any other job, profession or goal for that matter) = happiness?

For some it may….but for MOST it’s just barely enough motivation to make you get off the couch in the morning and make something happen.  The end result HAPPINESS is so intangible, seemingly elusive and far out in the distance.  It just doesn’t seem real because it is something that we are constantly striving towards but that we never truly seem to reach.

In my experience, having the result or desire of happiness, fulfillment or success (or substitute any state of mind that you like) is not enough to drive you toward your goals.  Happiness, success and peace are in the here and now.  They are not an end destination – something that you drive towards or “try” to obtain.  No matter how many goals you set and hours that you work, you will never end up at the train station of happiness or success.  You need to get on the train of happiness or success now and see where it leads you.  Happiness and success are who you are already – or at the very least, who you are capable of being right now if you choose to be.  Therefore, they can’t possibly be something that motivates you to achieve your goals.

If you are currently struggling to reach your goals, I want you to stop right now, sit down and examine what the real and deeper meaning is for you.  The real “WHY” that you want to have a result or an outcome.  Once you connect to this real WHY – and you will know it when you have stated it because you will connect to some REAL EMOTION – that will be the moment when the tires hit the pavement and you begin to get real traction and momentum towards achieving your goal(s).

From my own experience as a coach, author and speaker,  I can tell you that writing and publishing a book is not easy.  If I simply wanted to have happiness or to make a few dollars selling a book, it simply would not have been enough to keep me moving forward when things got tough.  For me, the driving force behind my first book was 2 THINGS –  (1) I want for my mother’s life to have meant something and for her love and kindness to live on forever and (2) I want to be in a position to financially support children from disadvantaged backgrounds to have the food, clothing, supplies and support that they need to stay in school.  It’s that simple for me.  It was never about the book, the career or the goal – it has always been about the deeper meaning for me.

Now I don’t know what the REAL WHY will be for you….now might be a really good time to figure out what that is for you.  But I do know that when you find it, you will become UNSTOPPABLE and your success will become INEVITABLE!

Do you believe in New Years Resolutions?

Life isn’t always easy – there can be no question about that. It’s unpredictable and it’s often hard to make sense of what happens. Some of the events in our journey end up being nothing more than minor irritants, while others are more like being hit by a Mack truck at 200 kph.

Regardless – we have to play the hand we are dealt.

Part of the process of coming to terms with whatever occurs in your life is to find a way to make sense of it. If science indicates that objective reality doesn’t actually exist, it is very much up to us to create a reality that helps us move on and find some meaning. As W Mitchell so accurately points out, ‘It’s not what happens to you, it’s what you do about it that matters’.

I like to think of it as choosing to ‘make chicken soup out of chicken shit’. And it is often in these times of desperation or perspiration that we accomplish our greatest achievements. We play the hand that we have been dealt and in so doing we stretch beyond the finite boundaries of probability and skill into the realm of possibility and inspiration.

For Christopher Reeve a random riding accident changed his life. Everything he was in terms of his career and how people perceived him vanished the instant he hit the ground. And yet he was able to muster his resources and master his own mind so as to find a reason to carry on. I’m sure becoming paralysed was not part of his life plan. I’m sure there must have been times that he was angry and bitter, but these feelings obviously didn’t consume him.

The simple truth is that Christopher Reeves found himself in a wheelchair at just 43 years old. Nothing could be done to change that. There was no way to wind back the clock and no way to repair the damage. His condition was permanent. But his state of mind and any negative emotions he felt were temporary and 100% within his control. He had two options: (1) let the event consume his life and extinguish his spirit or (2) accept his condition and make the best use of his time and influence to advance science in the hope that someday others with spinal cord injuries might walk again. In many ways, he became more of a superhero after his accident than he had previously been in his film roles because he created a vision and a purpose that was bigger than the event that changed his life.

He accepted the cards he was dealt in the game of life and he played with the courage, determination and strength of character of a superhero. Perhaps Christopher himself said it best, ‘I think a hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles. They are the real heroes, and so are the families and friends who have stood by them.’

TODAY – is the perfect time for you to stand back and celebrate the superhero within yourself and others. If you choose to play the hand you’ve been dealt to the best of your ability…I think you will look back [someday] and agree that the “game” was worthwhile.

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